TRIGGER WARNING: I SPEAK ABOUT DEPRESSION AND SUICIDE. PLEASE READ WITH CAUTION.
I’ve decided to take this seriously.
There are few issues that plague our community as black women, as black people, as the human race:
The areas that need the most improvement:
- Health: Fitness and Mental Health
- Career and Finances
For me, in order to be of use to the world, I feel it’s best to put your best foot forward and to improve oneself first. Just so happens, the areas mentioned above are the same areas where I am needing the most improvement 😊. So I thought I’d start off by taking you along my health journey.
I’ve done a lot of work on myself mentally in the past 14 years or so. Seeing numerous therapists, life coaches, psychiatrist. Reading book after book. Watching too many videos on YouTube to count. All in an effort to “fix” myself. Now I know I was not broken, I just needed some help accepting the events that traumatized me and not allowing that to dictate my present. I know traumatize is a strong word, but you have to call it like you experience it. I’m sure it something we have all been traumatized at some point in our lives according to this is the definition:
Presently, I have to also admit I’ve made great strides in my journey to “fix” myself, and though I don’t think I am or maybe even wish to be done with my mental health journey, I am happy to be a work-in-progress. I’ve come a long way from waking up everyday and my first thoughts being “You have nothing. You have no one. What the hell are you doing with your life?” and fantasizing about killing myself. It pains me to write that, but it was true, it is real. I want to share my story with you all, especially for the people who’s thoughts echo mine at the time. We neglect ourselves too often in today’s world.
The twin to my mental health, and a contributing factor to my mental health, is my physical health, or to make it a little shorter, FITNESS. I have been on a fitness journey since I hit adolescence, so 17 or of my 28 years. Wow, putting it this way makes me feel like I’m losing this battle. However, I intend to win. Over the past few weeks I have been intermittent fasting(IF) and have completed two 3 day extended fasts(EF) in the past two weeks, which is crazy because up until last week I wasn’t able to complete more than 2 day after my first time in February. So this makes me really happy and excited. I’ve currently lost 3.9kg which is about 8.58lbs in the past 4 weeks. I expect to get my weight lower by switching to OMAD (One Meal A Day) on my IF days, eating more healthily, and exercising throughout. I realize now I tend to binge a bit after an extended fast(EF), partially because I buy whatever I want while I’m just counting down the hours until I break my fast. If you’ve ever done an EF the last day kind of breaks you, at least if it’s 3 days. I’m challenging myself to do a 7 day fast for my next fast which I will be documenting heavily. I think the trick is to stay busy…hence why I shopped and cooked for my last two.
I don’t know everything about health, but I intend on researching and presenting that knowledge to you all in video and written form. My hope is by chronicling my journey, will help you, in some kind of way it does.
P.S. Thanks to my darling sister Siara(future star), who has yet to actually finish her profile. She inspired this posts. Thanks for telling me to go with the creative flow.